I finally got to sit down and think about the year that has passed. Well, not yet. I was just motivated to write something about my year after seeing many posts on notes and walls and blogs about people's adventures in 2010. I have to say, 2010 turned out just the way I wanted it to be, and more. I started 2010 without any hesitations. I crashed on obstacles blocking my way, plowed on walls of discontent and unworthiness, and found myself skiing on the slopes of Niigata, Japan on Christmas day.
I made a concrete, doable plan for myself in the next years at the end of 2009. I began working on this plan at the beginning of 2010. I sacrificed precious moments just to complete several necessary requirements, a must, to begin my plan. It was arduous, and backbreaking. I had to do it alone. And in the end, I realized that there was no other way around that. I was already a grown-up. And so began my first foray to independence. I did all of that while doing my thesis proposal. It was by far the toughest year of my course. The junior incinerator, I would call it. It was the moment often touted "make or break year." I lost weight, sleep, appetite, and the most important thing I lost - my social life. Kidding. I lost my social beer life that time. But I did all of those, sacrificed everything because I knew I could do them. And so I did. I was extremely proud of my proposal and how it turned out, although my professor wanted me to tone it down to an undergraduate level as it was too exhaustively full-blown, more than what my masters and PhD classmates in research could do. Oh and by the way, That semester and the previous semester, heck, that school year, I was particularly challenged because I had in my class several masters and PhD students taking the same course. I wouldn't want to be left behind in class, so I worked hard, and I think I and my classmates impressed them. It turned out they too were especially challenged because they didn't want to be overdone by mere undergrads. It was a healthy, and beneficial competition. I learned a lot from them, and it was a blast hanging out with these kinds of people. Myself in the future. Anyway, turned out all the work I did payed off. I got accepted as an exchange student. I got in a youth conference/training and met the most wonderful people in the World, although I didn't quite finish the program because it conflicted with my studentship. And then the long wait began. It was, a most boring yet freeing period. I had nothing to do for four months, and I did a lot in that span. I can't quite put it, I had nothing to do, but I was busy.
September came and I boarded the plane to Tokyo. It was a rush of new things. A lovely, lost feeling. I was consumed by the rigidness of the society, down to the smallest details literally littering their world. I got to taste, and still am, first world living. It's not that bad, it's actually great. I sometimes think how I'm going to be able to adjust again to developing world life. My measure is the discipline of people on waiting in lines. That does not exist in the Philippines. In several of my previous blog posts, I ranted about my financial situation here, but now, I think I'm getting the hang of it. I am past the poverty months. It's all good.
I don't remember any strong emotion I felt from this year. Nothing registers of that sort. I guess this stems from my conviction to just do everything I can to make things work, and not cry over spilled milk, or what I thought was milk. Not even when I first flew international, or my first encounter with snow. I got to ski for god's sake. And it was awesome, way beyond my limited tropical comprehension. Hell, now I have a new entry on my list of hobbies: skiing. :P Oh, there was emotion after all. But suppressed. Else I would've just bawled over and cried and jumped around in my happiness.
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| 2010: a tiger of a year |
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